The Truth

Correction

Okay, I noticed that the link I had for Rev. Fun was not working on my previous post, so I tried to go back and fix it. It then linked to a totally different website. But, now I have finally fixed it. So you can either go click on #9 or just click here for the website. Sorry!

101

Okay, usually I don't like to do things that other people are doing just because they are doing them. But I was reading Pam's 100 list and I just really wanted to make one of my own, so here it is. 101 things I Love!

1. the Holy Spirit
2. Grace
3. Kalista
4. Xander
5. Amanda, my soul mate
6. Alexis
7. Anoe
8. forgiveness
9. Rev. Fun.com
10. Wrigley Spearmint gum
11. Q-tips
12. reading my friends' blogs
13. seeing my name listed on my friends' blogs links
14. dinner at erica's
15. my new refridgerator (pictures coming soon)
16. my garage door opener
17. my spongebob mouse
18. spongebob mousepad
19. spongebob keyboard stickers
20. the really cool lipgloss from bed, bath, and beyond Brandi told me about
21. Cherry Mikeska's daily dose of telling me I'm beautiful
22. paychecks
23. hearing the bells chime every day every hour from 9 am to 9 pm
24. my pink hawaiian watch that glows
25. Tide with downy
26. kissing the skin on my children's necks
27. blogging
28. apple butter
29. balsamic vinegaraitte
30. the good memories with marcos
31. my mom's laugh
32. when my sister braids my hair
33. fridays
34. online billpay
35. macaroni and cheese
36. hydrogen peroxide in my ear
37. curves workout
38. friends who don't judge
39. being lice-free
40. fire extinguishers
41. old navy online
42. looooooooong, hot showers
43. internet
44. not having to buy diapers
45. God is remolding me
46. the smell of wood burning
47. cell phones
48. favorite pens
49. coffee cups with cute sayings
50. nike pumps
51. velcro
52. bleach
53. neosporin
54. the water fountain in my refrigerator
55. the ice maker in my refrigerator
56. the memory of my father
57. who I am today and delivered from who I was yesterday
58. independent films
59. my womb
60. Kingdom Life Fellowship
61. sunflowers
62. America
63. random ice storms that bring Texas to a screeching halt
64. technology
65. inventions
66. doorknobs (think about how hard it would be without them)
67. hearing my children breathe while sleeping
68. becky's beautiful photographs
69. rachel's open heart
70. erica's awesome hair
71. brenda's unmistakable laugh
72. cherith's bouncy hair and personality
73. my future husband God has waiting for me
74. schwan's
75. pam's understanding ways
76. unsweet peach tea from sonic
77. Mexican Fridays at Little Pit
78. lime green
79. the way erica never gets frustrated or irritated with me and AALLLL my cooking questions
80. carmex
81. favorites (as in the list you keep on the internet of your favorite sites)
82. long hair
83. the last day of my period
84. worshiping
85. my revlon flat iron (although, a chi would be better)
86. BFW women's retreat
87. gospel gangsta rap
88. in-door plumbing
89. five lines on my clearwire modem
90. children's motrin
91. oh, i was kidding about #87
92. freshly cut grass
93. kalista's mole on her back that I have in the same exact place
94. a fresh, new package of computer paper
95. being the first one to drink out of the milk jug
96. waking up by myself with no alarm clock
97. my brother's salvation that is going to come soon
98. the awesome, wonderful, magnificent, trustworthy, beautiful husband God is preparing for my sister
99. organized milk (read pam's blog to understand)
100. penecillin
101. (good) hygiene

It's Official People

So, it's official. I had my first kitchen fire while trying to cook lunch for me and the kids today. People think I am exaggerating when I say I can't cook. It's the God's honest truth! I wanted to make Hamburger Helper for us for lunch. Seems pretty simple, right? Nope. My stove caught on fire while I was "browning" (term used on the box) the ground meat. The kicker of it also is that my stove is electric so there weren't any open flames! I had to call my neighbor over to help me because knew for sure that I couldn't throw water on it being a possible grease fire and my stove being electric. He brought over his fire extinguisher but we thankfully didn't have to use it because it kind just died out on its own. Kalista was asking me from the living room why was it so smoky. I didn't know what to tell her. Then she came into the kitchen where me and my neighbor were discussing how to prevent this in the future. She said, "Was there a fire?" I said, "Not really." Then she said, "Then why is there a fireman here?"

Touche.

Much Contemplation

This is the dream I had last night:


I was living in an apartment with my kids, sister, and her kids. Marcos lived there also, but his room was sort of separate from our space. We were all sleeping when I heard a cell phone ringing. I got up to find the cell phone and then I realized it was Marcos'. For some reason he wasn't answering it, maybe it didn't wake him up. I picked it up and when I looked at the caller id it said "Juxtaposition" but I knew that it was his girlfriend. I answered the phone and said, "Hello" She said, "Hey! I was thinking that we could go Christmas shopping together later." She didn't realize that it was me and not Marcos. I told her, "I don't want to go Christmas shopping with you." Then she said, "Oh...I think I have to go." I was so angry! That she called him, that I talked to her, and that they were doing intimate things. I threw the phone at Marcos where he was sleeping (which was on the floor instead of his bed).

I yelled at him "Your stupid slut just called!"
He said, "You don't have any right calling her that. You don't know her."
"But I do know that we were together when you met her, I know that she knew you had a family, I know she knew about me!"

He got up and started getting dressed to leave. I saw that he had picked out a shirt to wear that I had bought him. I was so furious that he was going to wear something I bought to be around her. I took his shirt and dumped it in the toilet then brought it back to him and said, "There, you can have it now." He got really mad about this. He grabbed me by my wrists and bit my arm. When he let go, I yelled, "You want to bite me? I'll do it for you!!" Then I bit myself hard enough to make myself bleed. He let me go and sat down on the couch. He was looking at the negatives to film. Somehow, I knew that they were pictures of him and her. I grabbed them out of his hands and ripped them apart. He tried to hit me with a telephone cord. I took the cord from him and hit myself repeatedly, just staring at him while I was doing it. I dropped the cord, pushed him to the couch, and sat on top of him. Our noses were almost touching we were so close and I told him, "Nothing hurts as much as what you have done. It pierces my heart. It stabs me in my chest. I could show you."

I got up to walk out and I looked at the torn film and I thought that there were pictures of me and him on there. I told him, "Even if there were pictures of us, they don't matter any more. That is nothing now."




I have been having dreams kind of like this a lot lately. I have prayed that God would take them away. I hate having to wake up those mornings. I just think about Marcos and how much I am hurt by him. About how much I still love him and miss him. It's been 6 months now, I shouldn't still be crying over him, should I? I just want relief from these kinds of dreams. It hurts too much.

Interpretation

This kinda goes with the previous post but I wanted to make it's own little post. When Kalista had got done praying for my ear, Xander had said, "Me too! Me too! I pay you!" Which means "I want to pray for you too." I said "Okay but be careful. My ear really hurts." Well, most of the time when Xander prays no one can understand him because he makes a noise in his throat and moves his mouth but not in a way that makes words. It's kind of hard to explain; you just have to hear him pray one day. The only part we can understand is when he says "Amen!" really loud. He did his usual thing and then we all said Amen and then Kalista says in the most grown up look and voice: That's Okay. God can understand him. He (God) knows what he's saying."

I just had the biggest smile ever because it is so true! No matter what, God understands Xander and knows what he's saying. God knows Xander's heart and his thoughts. To God, Xander speaks with perfect articulation!

Healed in the name of Jesus!

This is so exciting y'all!! On my last post I was telling you of my ear infection and how much it was hurting. I had prayed for it to be healed. I was just telling God that He could take it away right then or even just let my ear burst so it would take the pain away; I would be happy with either one. I just needed some kind of relief. But since so many people didn't want me to take the "Proactive-Needle" approach, I was just praying/begging for it. Well when the kids and I were getting ready for bed, I was complaining about how much my ear hurt. Kalista said, "I can pray for you. I can pray that it stops hurting." I said, "Okay, let's do this!" She put her hand over my ear and said, "Lord, let my Momma's ear stop hurting. Let her ear be healed, let her be healed right now. Please Lord make my Mommy feel better because I love her and she's hurting. Thank you, Amen." I thought it was so cute! It actually did start to feel a little bit better then but I didn't know if it was because of the prayer or the three 500 mg Tylenols I just took. We then laid down and I was just getting into the deep sleep when I heard 2 or 3 really loud pops in my hurt ear. Then I heard a whooshing sound and felt something running out of my ear. My ear had burst! It felt SOOOOOO much better!! There wasn't any more pain, no hotness, and no high pitch noise! There was a whole lot of blood and pus (just as I suspected) but no pain! Hallelujah!Thank you Jesus! All night all that junk was coming out of my ear (don't worry, I had tissue in my ear to soak it up) and I had to wake up every so often to change out the tissue in my ear because it was bleeding through the tissue. In my entire life, I have NEVER had an ear infection last this short of a time. I get them a lot because I don't know how to leave my ears alone and end up bruising my eardrum quite frequently. So, the point of this story was that my baby girl healed me by using the power of God. My baby has so much more faith already than I do now. She makes me believe in Jesus more than anything else in this world.

my ear hurts X*(

Last night I woke up about 4 in the morning with my eardrum feeling like someone was holding it and squeezing as hard as they could. Why would someone want to do that? Anyway, I took Aleve and couldn't get back to sleep for a looong time. All during church today I was convinced that I was singing much too loudly since I could only hear my voice and not much else since my ears are all stuffy. I prayed about it for a little while but then forgot all about it when Bryan began his sermon. Once again, I felt like he was talking directly to me. He talked about how we do sinful things but expecting God's grace to cover us anyway. I am so guilty of that. I keep "abusing" the grace and salvation that Jesus died for. Anyway, I realized when I was standing in line for Communion that I could a hear a constant really high-pitch tone in my right (hurt) ear. That is REALLY annoying. It's been with me all day! Right now I just wish that my eardrum would just explode to relieve some of the pressure going in there. When I tilt my head, I can hear the liquid (most likely pus) swishing around. Yeah, how's that for a visual?? If it gets any worse, I am seriously thinking about just getting a needle and seeing if I can just pop it open. That would have to be than this!

Wii Exercise

So, like I heard from my friend who bought a Nintendo Wii that he would get tired after playing it. For those of you who don't know about Wii, it's a new kind of video game. It has two controls connected by a length of cable, the controls have remote sensors in them that lets the console know the location of your hands and the position that they are in. I probably didn't give it justice with that lame description so just look up Nintendo Wii in Google or something.

Anyway, I'm getting way off point here. He was telling me about how he would get tired after he finished playing and said that it would probably be a good way to exercise to lose weight. I didn't really think much about it at the time. I was like, "No way am I going to be a gaming dork just to lose weight."

Well, when I was looking at stuff on the internet, I came upon this website about a guy who decided to see if he could lose weight by using the Wii. He didn't change anything else in his daily regimen. He ate the same things, exercised (or didnt) the same, and only added 30 minutes of playing the Wii. He did lose weight, inches, gained muscle tone in 6 weeks.

So, I'm thinking I should get one of these things and become a gaming dork too! If it means I can have fun and lose weight I'm gonna do it!

My Internet Sucks

Well, I am sure you can tell what I am thinking according to this entry's title. All weekend long my internet has not worked. It would tease me by letting me onto my homepage (at dial-up pace) and when I tried to go to any other page it would "Cannot Display Page" all over the place. Well, today I tried to get on AGAIN. I was just sitting here waaaaaaaiiiiiittting for my homepage to load when I thought I should use that time to straighten up my desk. When I picked up the modem, the page loaded up instantly. I wanted to check to make sure it wasn't just a coincedence with it just finally loading up completely at the same exact time as me lifting up the modem. I put my theory to the test. I went to another website while holding the modem up in the air and, voila, my internet did what it's supposed to. So, now I am doing the internet with the modem in the air. Reminds me of the good old days with rabbit ears. :)

Words to Love You

I have been stuck inside my house this whole weekend with nothing to do but lay in bed and try to sleep so I can stop feeling so yucky. I just had to get the flu the same weekend we have an icestorm! And (i am guessing because of the weather) my internet isn't working so I couldn't even get on and "surf." (i'm at work right now) Anyway, Saturday night at about 2 in the morning ( i couldn't sleep because I kept coughing painfully) I was listening to some christian music. It wasn't like the music we listen to in church but I still felt like I was praising God. I found myself lifting up my hands, closing my eyes, and looking up wanting Him to hear my words, my voice, my heart. It was so good! So, anyway, I kind of wanted to make a list of my fave christian songs I love to sing to Jesus! Here it goes:

1. Made to Love - Toby Mac
2. The Way - Telecast
3. Love Song - Third Day
4. Better is One Day - Kutless
5. Shine - Salvador
6. Never Let Go - Matt Redman
7. Sanctuary - Jaci Velasquez
8. Right Here - KJ-52
9. Amazing Grace - Tori Amos
10. Heavenly Hills - Apologetix
11. My King - Nobody Famous
12. Enough - Barlow Girl
13. Cannot Hide My Love - Hillsong
14. Lay It Down - Jaci Velasquez
15. When the Rain Comes - Third Day

Those aren't all of them but those are the top ones I feel move my spirit. Right now, superfavorite is Made to Love by Toby Mac. His new CD isn't out yet I just heard it for the first time the other day and it rang so true to my heart.

The Chorus goes, "I was made to love You, I was made to find You, I was made just for You, made to adore You. I was made to love and be loved by You.

You were here before me, you were waiting on me. And you said you'd keep me, never would you leave me!"

So good.

Update on El Trabajo

That's right, I talked spanish! I was going back to my roots for a minute there. Anyway. I just wanted to kind of give an update about my job as of late. I have come in to some VERY good fortune (i should say blessings. soooo I will say blessings), ahem, blessings in relation to my job and other areas.

Have I ever told you how much I love our Lord Almighty! He is an AWESOME GOD!! Well, I found out today that I am getting a raise. yay for me! And not only that, I am getting a monthly allowance for Health Insurance Now!! I can finally go to the doctor for that pesky AIDS.

Totally just kidding! But I can for real go to the doctor for all my "womanly" stuff. Another thing is that I feel totally convicted about all those things I said about my boss. I am really trying to keep in my mind that he is just human, like me. I know I mess up A LOT (if you don't know this, have you even been paying attention to my blogs??) and I know that Jesus wants me to be more forgiving and waaaaay less judgemental. I was telling Boss about my refrigerator and it's latest talent of turning off for no reason and how my freezer stuff melted and all that. Well, right then he gets on the phone and asks a friend to start looking for a new fridge for me. His friend (who is also my friend-mad props to J.D.) found several that day. We went to go look at them, and to be honest, I thought they would be crap. But they weren't! They were marvelous. The whole time I was thinking of a way I could come up with the money to buy this awesome refrigerator when J.D. tells me that Boss is buying it for me!!!!! I picked out a Side-by-Side with a water & ice cube thing on it. I am so blessed y'all!! For real yo!

Oh another thing that I am very grateful for is that my child support is being raised too! Marcos was only paying $150 a month for BOTH of our kids. Now he has to pay $402 a month. I felt bad at first about it, but then I didn't because he chose not to show up to our hearing and plus it takes a lot more than that to raise our children.

So, anyway, I wish everyone could see the bear-hug I am giving God!

The Heart Wants What the Heart Wants

So, for a while I have been dating/friends with a guy who will remain anonymous until further notice. We will call him "?". Anyway, ? and I have a really strange and complicated relationship from the beginning. In the beginning our relationship started out in the worst possible way. I was cheating on Marcos with ?. I tried several times to break it off but I would inevitably go back to him over something insignificant or trivial that happened in my "real" relationship. I sought out spiritual counseling from another couple from my church but then would lie to them so I could continue my sin with ?.

I hate who I was then. I hurt ? just as much as I hurt my family. He was always there whenever I decided I wanted to "play". To him though, it wasn't just play. He had his heart in the relationship. The truth is, I was being a selfish brat. It cost me dearly. I lost respect for myself, from my daughter, and Marcos. I didn't trust Marcos anymore because of my actions. Yeah, I know...totally backwards.

When I finally started moving forward in my faith, I realized what kind of sin I was committing. I changed everything a few weeks leading up to the BFW. I really felt that God was speaking to me about the relationships in my life. I felt Him so close to my heart. I saw how much I was hurting both ? and Marcos, even though by this time I wasn't doing anything but talking to ?. But I was still having those thoughts and feelings. I was still keeping an avenue open just in case I needed to get "even" with Marcos. After the BFW, I became dedicated like never before to Marcos. I was totally convicted about my actions. I knew that God didn't want me to ration out my body like it was governemnt commodities. He wanted me to see myself as He sees me. As something that should be cherished, adored, and most of all waited for. I do have to say that the whole thing with Marcos did not work out how I imagined. But this isn't my plan afterall, it's God's. He has a proven track record of knowing what is better for me.

Well, anyway. About a month after Marcos moving on without us, I began talking to ? once again. I had no intentions whatsoever of making a serious relationship with him. I just wanted companionship and fill that void I was constantly feeling. He would listen to me while I was crying over Marcos and just hold me. He has always been so constant, NO MATTER WHAT I have done. Believe me, I have done some really cruel things to ? and still he doesn't waiver. So here we are 4 months down the road. I am still trying to work on my sex issues and my spiritual growth. ? knows how much I wanted to be married. He tells me he would marry me if I would let him. I do want to be married but I don't want to be married to the wrong man. My feelings aren't as strong or constant as his. I still love Marcos. I hate it, but it's true. I have prayed over my relationship w/ ? so many times, and I think I have received the answer before but just have ignored it because of my selfishness. I feel it in my heart that ? just isn't the one I am supposed to be married to. The only reason he goes to church right now is because I go and he wants to spend more time with me. I don't want that. In all my prayers about my future husband, I always ask for a man who worships the Lord whole-heartedly and without any reserve. I can't exactly force ? to love God the way I do either.

It's just so confusing. On paper, he looks like the perfect guy for me; but in my heart, it feels wrong. But I don't know if I feel that way because he doesn't treat me like crap or if I am still not over Marcos or if I am still thinking that I want to "play" instead of being committed. I am so sorry this entry is really jumbled up. I am just putting things down as they come to my mind. I am also sorry that this entry isn't as uplifting and funny as my others. There's a lot more to this story (aka drama) but my fingers can't keep up with my thoughts and they way they are twisting around right now. I guess I need CLEAR guidance and peace.

Jobby-job

I have been thinking about my place of employment lately, since I started working there in August. When I was hired there, I thought that God had done everything except pick me up and carry me to that place. I really felt that it was the place for me to grow, show my talents, learn, be fed, to stay, to give everything I could. I still feel that way just with a different perspective. After about two months of working there, I didn't think I could take it anymore. My "boss" (and i use that term very loosely, like parachute pants loose) was very un-there. He offered practically no guidance, leadership, or support. On many different occasions, he would tell one "member" something, then when they would get in trouble for following his directions, he would totally change his story. I even made up a name for the maneuver he does: I call it the Teflon. Whenever any kind of responsibility comes to him, He does the Teflon. What he does is spray himself with verbal teflon so that nothing is ever his responsibility. When people would come into counseling (this actually happened to me personally), he would call his wife without asking them if it's okay he invites a total stranger into the counseling session. I mean, HELLO! I came there to talk to the guy who does the counseling as a profession, not his wife! When I was hired, he promised me certain benefits, office furniture, and a pay that I never saw. On two different occasions, he has brought up VERY personal business of mine in front of other members without asking me. I don't mean like he brought up that I'm on a ice-cube only diet or that I am obsessed with Star Trek. I mean he brought up my sexual past and my criminal history. Yeah.... Oh, and he did all this while only being in the office a max of 10 hours a week. Well, anyway, back to the 2 month mark. I was so freaking stressed out about my work. I was crying everyday when I went home, almost everyday I would say to myself, "Today is the day I am going to stab/shoot/maim him." But, of course, I did none of those things. I prayed relentlessly. I also talked to the only other employee in the office who had already been there for 2 years (longer than boss). He would calm me down, make me see that it's just a job, the boss wont be there for very long (that's the kind of establishment it is), and that everything will be okay. I was still stressing over all the junk. Then one day, I just said to myself, "This isn't going to get any better soon. Either suck it up or do something." I quit speaking all the bad things. I was just perpetuating a cycle with all that. And I just decided that I was letting my JOB ruin my happiness so I was just going to not take it so serious. I gave the anger and resentment over to God and let Him heal my heart in that area. I can say that 3 months later that I am much more at peace with where I am at. There are still things that make me want to go postal, but I try my best to deal with them in the best way I can. I am committed to this job. I love it now. I love the people I work for (there's about 150 of them) and I care about them. I want to do anything I can to make things better, easier, more enjoyable for them. And you know, a lot of them love me back. I get flowers, gifts, and compliments galore from them. They make it so much worth it. Especially a chosen few! I have changed my whole life for this job alone. I moved my family from Abilene to Clyde into a house that said establishment owns because they needed revenue from it. (and it doesn't hurt that its right next to the church, and it is so freaking awesome!!!!). This is where I am at. This is where my children are going to school. God is taking care of my family and blessing us in ways that I never thought possible. Although, I would have to say that it would be great if He blessed me with a refrigerator that doesn't have it's own colony of mold growing on it. It's really kind of gross. I am going to put saran wrap all over it so we won't be contaminated when we open the fridge. But I am very grateful for it. It was only $100 and it came just in time for the house to be inspected and pass. So, anyway, I don't really know the point of this blog, other than to put my thoughts on paper, i mean on screen? I don't know, you get what I mean.

Much love! And peace out!

Holla!

Free at last! Free at last!....and some other stuff

The Pharaoh has finally let my people go! Hallelujah & Praise the LORD! My family is officially lice-free!! Does anyone want to know the secret to getting rid of these horrible things? Okay, it wasn't all the poisionous toxins, it wasn't the continuous washing of everything not nailed down, it wasn't lysoling everything til it's dripping with ethanol, it wasn't saturating our heads in olive oil for 8 hours straight, and it sure wasn't the crying and the stomping around. It was prayer and a whole lotta combing with the expensive metal lice combs for 3 days and then a follow up every 3 or 4 days. Yup. So simple. There was no need to do all that other crap. Do you know how much RID & NIX made off my family alone?? I should buy stock in those darn companies! They should be sending me thank you notes for the employees' christmas bonuses! They should come out with a new line of solution named after my kids! There should be a scholarship to LICE College established in honor of the Chavez family! I should get a VIP card with frequent delicer miles or something. I should....okay, I ran out, but I think you get the gist of what I am trying to say here. Totally ridiculous! That's money I could have spent on other stuff like adding to my collection of broken coffee cups. Okay, okay, I don't really have a broken coffee cup collection, but I totally could. Anyway, I just kinda wanted to get that out there, the good news I mean.

Another thing that is kind of on my mind is (yes, you guessed it) Marcos. Yes, yes I know. He is a total loser. Why it took 7 years for me to figure this out, I have no clue. I am more angry now that I didn't see it earlier than I am about anything else now. Well, that and the way he acts like being a father is a thing that can be turned off or whatever. GGGRRRRRR! (that was me growling, not choking or getting my 'g' and 'r' keys stuck with caps lock on) Yesterday when I woke up I was thinking about how the kids are starting school this week and so they will be seeing even less of their father because his two days off are on Monday and Tuesday every week. So I called him to see if he would like them to stay the night with him since it will be their last chance for a while. Marcos' response: "Well, I plan on getting really f***ed up and I don't want kids there with me getting drunk." What freaking planet is this guy from? What in his little brain makes him think I WANT to know that? I just said, "Yeah, okay, that's too much information and I gotta go." I know the way I was feeling right then wasn't real christian and I am working on that. I just felt like punching him. Anywho, me and the kids had fun anyway. Amanda rented like 9 movies and we watched them all. We had cheese sticks and chicken nuggets to eat. Although, sadly, I have to admit that the kids stayed up later than I did. I am such a wuss now! I was actually glad that they stayed home because whenever they leave, I just feel so empty.

Yet another topic. I do NOT like animals; especially cats or dogs. Their hair ends up on everything, makes my allergies act all crazy, and they're always wanting something like to eat, or go outside or something! Anyway, yesterday there was a cat oustide my house harrassing (i call it harrassing but the kids call it playing or whatever) the kids when they were riding their bikes. The cat seriously would not leave. I finally let it inside (i'm a sucker for the kids) and gave it some balogna and water. Then Amanda and I took the kids on a walk/bike ride (it's walk/bike ride because amanda and i both do not own bikes so we had to walk while the kids sorta rode their bikes while they weren't running into each other, curbs, plants, etc etc) to the Dollar Store. Amanda bought cat food and a water/food dish and I got it a collar with a bell. It totally hates the collar but at least I know where it is at now. So now we have a cat that drives my allergies crazy. Yeah..... Oh!!!!!! I bet you can't guess what the kids named it!! I will give you a hint: It's a woman's name from a VERY famous modern sci-fi movie that loosely represents Jesus' life. Whoever can guess right get's a $5 bill!!!!! Yay! I love excitement!