Okay, guys, prepared to see how wonderful God is! I have received so many wonderful blessings this week! So many blessings that I'm dropping them because I can't carry them all! Oh my gosh, I am so excited about everything God is doing for me and to me. I had prayed last Sunday night for God to show me that He loves, that He remembers I am alive, that I haven't been forgotten about. Oh, He did that and so much more! Well, okay, let me quit rambling and just tell y'all what the dealio is.
First Blessing! :)!!
Boss came into the office Monday morning way earlier than usual, like before lunch. He asked me to come into his office to have a "talk" with him. I was so like, "Uh-oh" He first asked me if I was doing okay (a lot of people have been asking me that lately. mostly because they could see my mood wasn't what it usually was) and I told him Yeah, of course. He then started telling me that he was sorry for not being in the office as much as he should have been, that he wanted to know any way that he could help me do my job and work. How fantastic is that?? I had prayed for so long that God would help me in this situation and He did! Hi-Five God!
I was notified by mail that I have nominated by my instructors at TSTC to be added to the list in the American Junior College's Book of Who's Who. That is so neat and validating! Yay me! Almost makes my ridiculous amount of student loans worth it.
I have told a few people about the depression I have been going through lately. I have suffered from depression since I was about 11. I was 12 when I first tried to kill myself. My Mom put me on antidepressants when I was a Junior in High School because of a really close call with suicide. I think there was a lot of environmental and genetic problems that contributed to my depression. Anyway, I think you get the idea of how long this disease has plagued me. Last week, it was hitting me hard again. I would fantasize about the ways I could end my life. I just felt like everything I had ever done or would do would just end up crap. So, like, my great friend Pam suggested I make a Theophostic appointment at the church. So, I did. That day, Wednesday, I prayed all day for God to let me open to Him, for Him to show me how to let the Holy Spirit work and not let there be any resistance in me. I kept seeing a vision in my mind's eye of me ripping open my chest to let everything that God had for me into my heart, that's how open I wanted to be for Him. I wanted to do anything I could get relief from the heaviness. I showed up to the appointment with Brenda and Pam and we got to doing our thing. I was really unsure I was doing it right. When they asked me questions, I just answered whatever came to my mind first (hint: Holy Spirit). So, guess what?? I have been delivered of my depression!! I am not even taking my medicine! I did that day when I got home but it gave me a headache and made me feel sick. Like it would to someone who is taking it but not needing it!! The Holy Spirit also helped me be free of my hurt and anger from Marcos. Seriously guys, do you know how much that helps me? I still love Marcos, but it's not a hurt-love. It's a love that is pure and not full of resentment, bitterness, and hate. Funny how love can be mixed with those emotions. So good, so good! Hallelujah! I have been healed by the Holy Spirit!
I have been having a bit of a financial struggle since I moved into my new house here in Clyde. My rent increased like by a 1000% In Abilene, I only paid $4 a month for rent and here I have been paying $305. Huge increase along with increase in electricity and added water bill (didn't have to pay water in abilene). I also just began paying the DPS to get my driver's license reinstated. So all these things at once with no real increase in pay has been a bit stressful. Today I got a call from my HUD (they help me pay my rent) caseworker. She told me when I was recertified and she had input my income amount, the calculations were wrong. It turns out that I should not be paying $305 a month, but $141 a month!!!!! This is SOOOO good! This frees up so much more money I will be able to put towards other bills. Pam, can I get a witness??
When I moved out of my apartment in Abilene, I broke my lease. I was allowed to do so if I were to pay a reletting fee of $497. When I told my job, people got together and all picthed in to pay it for me, out of their own pockets! Amazing! That in itself is a blessing. Today in the mail I received an invoice from the apartment place telling me what all I owed. Well, because I left my apartment in such good condition (a first for me) that applied my deposit of $200 towards the reletting fee, so now all I owe is $297! Some people at the church will now get their money back. So awesome!