Sunday, November 22, 2009

Dreams

I've been having dreams of being pregnant for the last couple of weeks. In my dreams I am so happy and full of joy. When I wake up, I feel so sad. Sometimes I'll cry for a few minutes before I get up and shake it off. I don't like to hold babies because it hurts me. I feel stupid saying that I want a baby. I already have two beautiful children and I shouldn't be greedy. There are people with no children at all. I want God to restore my womb. I want to have more children because I'm a good mother. I want to have more children because I love the feeling of being pregnant, of growing something in me that is perfect, innocent, and beautiful. I want to have more children so they can grow up and have children. I want Tony to know what it's like to go through the whole process. He's an amazing father. He deserves the experience of holding his baby in his arms.

I'm just sad today at this moment. Not all the time. I see the goodness in my life. I just don't get to talk about this very much.

8 comments:

Bryan and Becky said...

God tells us to be fruitful and multiply. He has already blessed your womb in this one statement. If you really want to have another one....start speaking to your womb...start telling yourself that you are able to conceive...get out some pregnant pictures and put them where you can see them and picture yourself pregnant..."you've been pregnant before and you can be pregnant again"...

It might be a fight and I really don't know if you've had a hysterectomy or anything that causes you NOT to have children, but if not...then start fighting! I mean...if you really wanting to have another child :)

CALL ME MCKEE said...

All I can say is WOW. I did not know you even wanted another baby.I will pray for your womb.

冠陳儒 said...

人不能像動物一樣活著,而應該追求知識和美德................. ................................................

秀李李迪秀李李迪 said...

朋友是一面鏡子......................................................................

淑蕙春蕙春芬 said...

你文章很棒的~繼續分享給大家~~~~............................................................

怡靜怡靜怡靜怡雯 said...

人生匆匆-把握當下,支持鼓勵~事事如意~..................................................

8468 said...

上班好累哦,看看部落格轉換心情~~~先謝謝啦!!............................................................

慧SigridNolen1201珊 said...

來給你加油打氣!!!保重!!!............................................................